Wednesday, April 21, 2010

Death to Tyrants!

I am praying for a mutiny. Against myself. I have come to the conclusion that my ego is a tyrant and I no longer want to serve her selfish ambition and vain conceit. Her appetite for fame is insatiable. Her lust for glory is obscene. Her desire for power is downright embarrassing. I say, "Death to Tyrants!"

One problem. I don't know how to kill my ego. We share a body, and even when I issue an eviction notice, she doesn't seem to leave. She sticks around sharing her lofty dreams--her INSANELY self-absorbed dreams--that I am ashamed to admit I enjoy. We revel in them with a sick attraction, captivated like moths swarming a flame.

I'm reminded of the lyrics of one of my son's favorite songs:

There ain't no drug
The sickness is myself

Before I know it, I am serving that evil tyrant even though she and I both know that I have pledged my allegiance to another. He is not a tyrant. He is a servant King. He is a humble leader. He likens Himself to a shepherd. He gently leads, He sacrificially gives, He wholly loves.

I want to live for His glory. I want to live to make Him famous. I want to let His Spirit be the antibiotic that kills the infectious disease that is my ego.

Oh Lord, make it so.

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