Friday, July 22, 2011

How to Avoid Packing

Packing is no fun and must be avoided at all costs.

The best way to avoid packing is to fill your time with things that seem more urgent, like, for example, preparing meals. But if cooking normal meals does not take enough time, bake extras that everyone will LOVE so much that they fail to notice that you have not been packing any boxes. Baking bread is a really good option because it takes a lot of time. Yesterday I made these cinnamon rolls:

Recipe found here:
Of course, when in a sugar comma from eating cinnamon rolls, one could not be expected to pack, therefore, by making and eating cinnamon rolls, you will have effectively avoided packing for at least a day and a half.

Another good way to avoid packing is to play games. Long, drawn-out, on-going tournaments work the best. Chandler and I have been having daily Cribbage matches. He adds to our fun by creating Lego creatures to adorn the Cribbage board. We generally play three games a day, and the best two out of three wins the day. Chandler is a fierce competitor, and now that I have taught him all my pegging tricks, he gives me a run for my money. Or at least he would if we played for money. Which we don't.

Chandler is always blue. I am always red. But we have broken all of the red pegs,  so I play  on the red track using the green pegs. Clearly, Chandler was winning this one!
Sometimes a free evening can result in packing. To avoid this possibility, make sure to be aware of any free community events that you could spontaneously attend. Should you find yourself staring at empty boxes in the early evening hours, you can jump up and say, "I just remembered, tonight is the monthly meeting of Bankers for the Preservation of Under-Water Basket Weaving." Never mind that you are not a banker. Nor do you weave baskets.

We chose to go to the local Bastille Day Celebration. It was free, walking distance from our apartment, and a fantastic excuse to postpone packing.

If all else fails, start writing a novel. That's what I've done. I am horrible at writing fiction, but I'd rather wrestle with words than bother with boxes. So far I have a list of characters, though I have no idea how they are connected or what they are going to do. But at least they all have names. My favorite so far in an accountant named Lionel Richie who capitalizes on the name he shares with the famous singer by putting really dorky advertisements in the local newspaper. You know like, "I'll work on your taxes ALL NIGHT LONG" and "HELLO? Is it a CPA you're looking for?" Go ahead and groan. I told you I was lousy at fiction.

Still, writing a novel, albeit a bad one, does keep one free from the filling of cartons. And in the end, it's not really about telling a good story, it's about avoiding the pain of packing. So given that goal, my book is a soaring success.


  1. Love this!! You must be fierce competitors to break all the red Cribbage pegs. The green ones must be shaking in their holes!
    The cinnamon roles look delicious and well worth putting off packing to make.
    Could there be little packing elves in France that you could employ?

  2. We are moving on Saturday and I can so relate!! Thanks for your post - it sure made me smile :) Love, Karin

  3. David is a great man! David is a great father! David is a great husband!... And I betcha David would be a terrific packer-upper of your stuff so you can move soon person, too!