Monday, February 8, 2010

The Question

"Blessed is she who has believed that what the Lord has said to her will be accomplished!" Luke 1 :45

I want to believe. I intend to believe. I mean to believe. But sometimes, I really have a hard time believing that what the Lord has said to me will be accomplished. Is it really belief if I simply CHOOSE to believe, even when I am plagued by doubts?

I believe that He has saved me from my sin. I believe that He has redeemed my life from the pit. I believe that He loves me. I believe that He works all things together for my good and for His glory. I have a great deal of joy and peace in my life (read: BLESSED) because I do believe that all of these things that the Lord has said will be accomplished. But....

I doubt the things that He has said to me in the quietness of my own heart. I doubt the things that cannot be verified in the scriptures. And in the darkest moments of my doubt, I hear the same question that Eve heard in the garden: "Did God really say...?"

God had spoken to Eve, but she lost track of what He had said, and she let the enemy turn it all around, and she fell.

God had spoken to Mary, and she treasured His words in her heart, and she was blessed.

Neither could open their Bibles and find God's unique plan for her life written there plain as day.

A wise woman recently told me that when things get tough, it is important to go back to the call that God gave to us. I think I shall take her advice. Would you care to take a trip with me down memory lane?

October 2007: David and I go to Paris to celebrate our 15th wedding anniversary. We both come home burdened for the French people. We are united in our belief that God is calling us to share His love in France. Our unity is the first confirmation of the call. Then I heard the voice of the Lord saying, "Whom shall I send? And who will go for us?" And I said, "Here am I. Send me!" Isaiah 6:8

Winter 2007/2008: We share our thoughts with wise friends and family members, welcoming their input and seeking their counsel. Each one (without exception) prayerfully agreed that God appeared to be leading us to France. Listen to advice and accept instruction, and in the end you will be wise. Proverbs 19:20

June 2008: After a lengthy application process complete with theology tests, psychological tests, and intense interviews, we are appointed through Greater Europe Mission to plant churches in France. Their commissioning is another confirmation of the call. And how can they preach unless they are sent? As it is written, "How beautiful are the feet of those who bring good news!" Romans 10:15

September 2008-Today: Fundraising. Steadily, over 100 individuals have joined our support team. Each contribution represents another confirmation of God's call on our lives. For I testify that they gave as much as they were able, and even beyond their ability. Entirely on their own, they urgently pleaded with us for the privilege of sharing in this service to the saints. 2 Corinthians 8:3-4

He is doing this thing. So why do I have such a hard time believing that what He has said will be accomplished? He has shown Himself faithful over the past two years, the past two months, the past two weeks, the past two days, the past two hours! He IS accomplishing His work in us and through us.

But that darn question, "Did God REALLY say...?" lingers. Casting doubt. Feeding fear. Stirring anxiety.

And so I say, "YES!" God did really say. He said go to France. He said to love the French people in His name. He said to proclaim the Good News to the lost. He said, "Go!"

He who called us is faithful. He will do it. I will choose to belive that what the Lord has said will be accomplished. I will no longer entertain the question.

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